If you’ve been following along, we’ve been exploring three core questions about chronic pain:
What is pain, really?
Why does my body perceive pain the way it does?
How can I experience less pain, move better, and function more fully in daily life?
In the last two posts, we explored what pain is and how the nervous system processes it. Today, we begin answering the third question:
How do we experience less pain?
The first step is understanding the difference between pain and suffering.
Pain vs. Suffering: What’s the Difference?
Pain and suffering are often used interchangeably, but they are not the same.
Psychology Today offers this helpful distinction:
Pain: A physical sensation that occurs in response to injury or illness. It serves as a biological signal that something may need attention. Pain can be acute (short-term) or chronic (long-term).
Suffering: The emotional and psychological distress that arises from pain. It is influenced by how we interpret, react to, and relate to the pain — including anxiety, frustration, fear, or hopelessness.
Pain is a biological message.
Suffering is the story we build around that message.
When we reduce tension, fear, and resistance — as discussed in previous posts — we reduce the nervous system’s perception of threat. This alone can dial pain down.
But we can go further.
We can begin to separate sensation from interpretation.
Why This Matters for Chronic Pain
Pain is not optional.
Suffering often is.
We may not control the initial sensation, but we do have influence over:
Resistance
Catastrophic thinking
Identity-based beliefs (“I am broken”)
Fear-based projections about the future
Suffering is often the additional layer we heap on top of the biological pain.
It’s similar to the difference between guilt and shame:
Guilt says: “I did something wrong.”
Shame says: “I am wrong.”
Pain says: “There is sensation in my back.” Suffering says: “My body is broken and my life is over.”
One is data. The other is interpretation.
How to Distinguish Between Pain and Suffering
Use the following self-inquiry to separate sensation from story.
Step 1: Is This Sensation or Story?
Pain-focused questions (sensation):
What am I physically noticing right now (location, temperature, pressure, movement)?
Can I describe this using only sensory words?
Is the sensation shifting, even slightly?
Suffering-focused questions (story):
What am I telling myself about this sensation?
Am I predicting the future?
Am I making this mean something about who I am?
What am I afraid this pain will lead to?
Pain: “Sharp, pulsing in lower back.” Suffering: “This will never get better.”
Step 2: Is There Resistance?
Suffering often equals:
Pain × Resistance
Ask yourself:
Am I fighting this sensation?
Am I bracing or tensing against it?
What happens if I soften by just 5%?
If this sensation were allowed to exist for 30 seconds, what would change?
The nervous system amplifies pain when it senses threat. Resistance sends a threat signal.
Softening reduces it.
Step 3: Is Identity Involved?
Pain is an experience. Suffering becomes identity.
Am I saying “I have pain” or “I am broken”?
Has this sensation become part of who I think I am?
Who would I be without this story?
Step 4: Am I Time Traveling?
Pain happens in the present moment. Suffering lives in the past and future.
Am I replaying how this started?
Am I imagining worst-case outcomes?
If I focus only on right now, what is actually happening?
Often, this moment is tolerable. It’s the imagined trajectory that overwhelms us.
Step 5: What Is This Pain Trying to Protect?
This is where we shift into compassion.
If this pain had a protective job, what would it be?
What might my nervous system believe is dangerous?
Is there an unmet need underneath this sensation?
Pain is not your enemy. It is often your body trying to protect you.
Step 6: Separate Sensation from Meaning
Try this:
What is the raw data?
What is the interpretation?
Which part is optional?
Example:
Raw data: throbbing knee
Interpretation: “I’ll never hike again.”
Optional layer: catastrophic projection
A Simple Formula for Reducing Suffering
Pain = Sensation Suffering = Sensation + Resistance + Story + Fear
To reduce suffering:
Ease resistance.
Rewrite the narrative.
Challenge fear-based thinking.
Respond with self-compassion instead of self-judgment.
For example:
Instead of: “I won’t be able to provide for my family because I can’t work.”
Try: “I care deeply about providing for my family. I will explore options and get professional guidance.”
One is fear. The other is values-based action.
Want to Go Deeper?
If this resonates with you, I’ve created:
✔ A guided journaling worksheet to help you separate pain from suffering ✔ A nervous system reset practice ✔ Additional members-only resources for managing chronic pain through ACT, mindfulness, and yoga therapy
You can:
👉 Join my newsletter for free resources, guided practices, and early access to upcoming groups.
👉 Or explore the Members Content Library, where I share deeper teachings, downloadable worksheets, audio practices, and structured pain-management tools.
Last week, we explored the question “What is pain?” This week, we’re addressing an equally important question:
Why does my body perceive pain the way it does?
Understanding how pain works can be incredibly empowering — especially for people living with chronic pain. Pain is not just a message from injured tissue. It is a protective signal created and regulated by the nervous system.
Pain Is a Nervous System Response
Pain can be understood as a decision made by the nervous system to alert us that something may need attention or protection. When the nervous system senses danger, it turns up the volume on sensation.
This is helpful when you’re injured and need to rest or protect your body. It becomes problematic when the alarm system stays on long after healing should have occurred.
When that happens, pain:
feels more intense
lasts longer
spreads more easily
This can occur even when tissue damage has not increased.
Why Tension, Fear, and Resistance Amplify Pain
Three key factors are known to amplify pain signaling:
Tension
Fear
Resistance or avoidance
All three increase nervous system threat detection and reduce the brain’s ability to dampen pain signals (often called pain inhibition).
How Muscle Tension Maintains Pain
When the body perceives threat, muscles tighten reflexively to protect vulnerable areas. While this is adaptive in the short term, chronic muscle tension can increase pain.
Sustained tension:
reduces blood flow
limits oxygen delivery
increases metabolic waste
These changes activate nociceptors (pain receptors), sending more pain signals back to the brain.
This creates a self-reinforcing loop:
More pain → more guarding → more tension → more pain
Importantly, tension does not just result from pain — it also maintains pain.
When muscles soften, even slightly, the nervous system receives a message of safety, which can help reduce pain intensity.
How Fear Increases Pain Sensitivity
Fear activates the body’s threat system, including the sympathetic nervous system and limbic brain. When the brain perceives danger:
pain sensitivity increases
the pain threshold decreases
survival becomes the priority over comfort
When this state persists, it can lead to central sensitization, where the nervous system becomes overly reactive to pain signals.
A helpful way to think about this is:
If the brain thinks you’re in danger, it wants you to feel it.
Research shows that pain intensity often correlates more strongly with fear and catastrophic thinking than with findings on imaging studies.
Catastrophizing Thoughts and Chronic Pain
In cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), we often address catastrophizing thoughts such as:
“This pain means I’m permanently damaged.”
“It’s only going to get worse.”
“I’ll never live a normal life.”
“This flare means I’ve lost all my progress.”
“If I move, I’ll injure myself further.”
“My body is failing me.”
These thoughts are understandable — but they increase fear and nervous system activation, which can worsen pain.
CBT helps by identifying and challenging these thoughts, replacing them with more balanced and accurate ones.
In acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT), the focus shifts slightly. Instead of debating whether a thought is true, we ask whether it is helpful. If a thought pulls us away from what matters, we practice letting it be and choosing actions aligned with our values.
How Resistance Keeps the Pain Alarm On
Resistance to pain often looks like:
bracing or guarding
holding the breath
tightening against sensation
mentally trying to push pain away
Neurologically, resistance:
increases sympathetic arousal
keeps cortisol and adrenaline elevated
reduces parasympathetic (vagal) tone
This suppresses the brain’s natural pain-inhibiting pathways and keeps the nervous system in an alert, defensive state.
In short, resistance tells the nervous system:
This is not safe.
This helps explain why pain can persist after healing, flare during stress, or spread to new areas.
Turning the Pain Volume Down
Pain is not a personal failure. It is adaptive biology — a protective system designed to keep us safe.
With chronic pain, however, the alarm is often louder than necessary. The goal of therapy is not to eliminate pain entirely, but to help the nervous system feel safe enough to turn the volume down.
Through mindfulness, gentle movement, cognitive strategies, and values-based action, we reduce tension, fear, and resistance — creating the conditions for pain to soften.
Key Takeaway
Pain is not just about damage. It is also about protection, perception, and nervous system safety.
Please sign up for our newsletter to receive or freebie of the week, “3 Ways to Turn Down Pain Volume” (a pdf with specific practices you can do in the moment.)
Bonus Content
Subscribe to our members only page to access our content library including this week’s 10 minute audio of a guided meditation – Turning the Volume Down: A Nervous System Reset for Pain.
Our next group offering, Managing Chronic Pain through ACT, Mindfulness, and Yoga, is designed to help answer some of the most common—and often frustrating—questions people living with chronic pain ask:
What is pain, really?
Why does my body perceive pain the way it does?
How can I experience less pain, move better, and function more fully in daily life?
Today’s post focuses on the first question: What is pain?
Defining Pain: More Than a Physical Sensation
Merriam-Webster defines pain as:
“A localized or generalized unpleasant bodily sensation or complex of sensations that causes mild to severe physical discomfort and emotional distress and typically results from bodily disorder (such as injury or disease).”
While helpful, this definition still frames pain primarily as a physical symptom.
In July 2020, the International Association for the Study of Pain (IASP) revised its definition to better reflect what research and lived experience have long shown:
“An unpleasant sensory and emotional experience associated with, or resembling that associated with, actual or potential tissue damage.”
IASP also added several key clarifications that are especially important for anyone living with chronic pain:
Pain is always personal and influenced by biological, psychological, and social factors.
Pain and nociception (nerve signaling) are not the same thing.
Pain cannot be understood by sensory input alone.
A person’s report of pain should always be respected.
Pain may serve an adaptive role, but it can also negatively affect function, mood, and relationships.
Inability to communicate pain does not mean pain is not present.
Pain as a Protective Experience, Not Just a Warning Signal
One of my favorite explanations of pain comes from Neil Pearson, published in Yoga Therapy Today. He writes:
“Pain is both a complex experience and a complex biological process. Pain exists when neural circuits conclude that danger exists and that action is required. As such, it is so much more than a symptom or a message telling us that there is something damaged or diseased in the body. Pain is an experience. It motivates us to stop or change our behavior.”
This perspective helps explain something many people with chronic pain already know intuitively: pain is not a single signal, and it’s not always a reliable indicator of damage.
Why Pain Comes and Goes
We often think of pain as straightforward—like touching a hot stove and instantly pulling our hand away. But chronic pain behaves differently.
For example, imagine sitting quietly on the couch. Your low back starts to ache. You shift positions, maybe take some ibuprofen, and mentally review everything you should be doing to prevent this pain from returning—better posture, better lifting mechanics, more core strength.
Now imagine that a loved one suddenly cuts themselves badly and needs stitches. You’re grabbing your keys, driving to the ER, focused entirely on helping them.
What happened to your back pain?
Did it disappear? Yes—and no.
Your body didn’t suddenly heal your back. Instead, your nervous system reprioritized. Pain is perceived when the brain decides something requires attention right now. Sitting still gives your system space to say, “Hey, we should address this posture issue.” An emergency tells your brain, “This can wait.”
Pain, in this way, is a decision made by the nervous system, not just a direct response to tissue damage.
Pain and Emotions Speak the Same Language
This is where psychotherapy—and ACT in particular—becomes so relevant.
I often tell clients that emotions are messengers from the subconscious:
Fear asks us to protect
Anxiety asks us to prepare
Anger asks us to set a boundary
Joy tells us to keep going
Pain behaves similarly. It delivers information. It motivates action. But—like emotions—we don’t have to obey it blindly.
For example, if you’ve been in a car accident, your fear may insist that driving is dangerous. Therapy helps you gently remind your nervous system that while accidents can happen, the evidence shows you’ve driven safely many times. You acknowledge the message without letting it run your life.
Pain can be approached the same way.
Choice, Language, and Relationship with Pain
What stands out most to me—and what this group is built around—is the idea that there is choice. Sometimes conscious, sometimes not, our bodies decide every day how much pain we perceive and how loudly it speaks.
We already know our thoughts influence emotions. Research now shows that pain is influenced in similar ways. When we develop a new relationship with pain—and the language to communicate with it—we often find that suffering decreases, even when sensations remain.
That is exactly what we’ll explore in Managing Chronic Pain through ACT, Mindfulness, and Yoga: learning how to listen to pain, respond skillfully, and move toward a life that is fuller and more functional—with or without pain present.
For More:
You’re invited to join our Members-only Bonus Content Library, where you’ll find a variety of PDFs, recordings, and other resources to support your wellness.
A recent addition is an audio version of a guided meditation for cultivating body awareness and breathing through physical sensations with openness and compassion.
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Articles Referenced and further resources on Chronic pain:
Completing the Chakra Journey: The 6th and 7th Chakras
After a brief hiatus, I wanted to return and complete our chakra series by reflecting on our most recent group, which focused on the 6th chakra (third eye) and 7th chakra (crown).
The yoga sequence for this class was intentionally structured in two parts. We began with a flowing practice designed to open all chakras, allowing energy to move freely through the body. From there, we shifted into a slower, more focused practice that brought attention to the third eye and concluded with restorative postures and meditation.
Clearing the Path to Intuition
The intention of this practice was simple but profound: to reduce physical and mental distractions so that intuition can emerge more clearly.
Stress, tension, and unprocessed emotion often act as “blockages” in the body. When energy cannot flow freely, it becomes difficult to access inner wisdom or clarity. By first tending to the body, we create the conditions necessary to quiet the mind and begin discerning what truly matters.
In Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) terms, this is the space where we reconnect with our core values — the things that give our lives meaning beyond productivity or obligation. When the nervous system settles, clarity often follows. From that clarity, true rest and restoration become possible.
Mantras for the Upper Chakras
During this practice, we worked with two simple mantras:
“I am connected.”
“I rest in awareness.”
These phrases supported a shift away from doing and toward being — a theme that carried into our closing meditation.
What Remains When Nothing Needs to Be Done?
We ended with a final reflective prompt:
“What remains when nothing needs to be done?”
This question often brings up discomfort for many people. When the distractions fall away, clients sometimes notice feelings of anxiety, emptiness, or sadness — especially if much of their life feels superficial or disconnected from passion or purpose.
This is where the wisdom of the upper chakras becomes especially relevant.
What remains is awareness. What remains is the experience of witnessing life — seeing, sensing, and participating in the world as it unfolds. What remains is connection.
On a broader level, this can include a sense of cosmic connection — the understanding that we are part of something vast and interconnected. We share this planet together. We come from the earth and, eventually, return to it. On an even larger scale, we are part of the universe itself — quite literally stardust.
For some, this realization brings deep peace and belonging.
When Cosmic Connection Feels Like Too Much
For others, however, focusing on the crown chakra can initially feel isolating rather than comforting. If physical or emotional connection is lacking, cosmic connection may feel distant or hollow.
In Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, this level aligns with self-actualization. But self-actualization cannot be sustained without the layers beneath it.
This is where the third eye chakra invites us to see clearly:
to notice where community already exists,
to recognize opportunities for connection,
or to acknowledge that we may need to actively build community through small, intentional steps.
Working Up — and Down — the Chakras
If clarity or connection still feels blocked, it’s often helpful to move downward through the chakras rather than pushing forward:
5th chakra (throat): Do boundaries or unmet needs need to be voiced?
4th chakra (heart): Is there work to do around self-compassion, self-talk, or allowing love in?
3rd chakra (solar plexus): Is it time to build momentum, confidence, or take action toward what you want?
2nd chakra (sacral): Are emotions asking for attention, expression, or understanding?
1st chakra (root): Is there a need for grounding, safety, and reassurance — the reminder that you have the right to be here and to feel secure?
Self-actualization is not a straight upward climb. More often, it requires moving up and down, listening carefully to where energy feels blocked, and meeting ourselves there with patience.
Integration, Not Perfection
All of these layers are interconnected. To access higher awareness, we often must tend to foundational needs first. And as those foundations strengthen, clarity and meaning naturally rise again.
Continue the Practice
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